I lost one of my best friends in mid-Oct. One of the scariest things I've had to face during that time was the fact that I was his one and only friend. I don't think that I've ever felt so alone and so full of burden at the same time. All the pains, memories, deepest thoughts, and feelings were only known to me. I believe that is one thing that you can say is uncommon compared to others who grieve for their loved ones. There is no one I can talk to who truly understands...and I mean truly. It was the hardest to share memories about who he was to people who were supposed to be the closest to him, but never cared enough to know him until now.
It will never be the same. I still find myself wanting to write to him every time something that reminds me of him comes up. Today would've been his 25th birthday. Happy birthday and I hope that you're finding the peace you've been seeking. Love you and miss you very much.